So I was supposed to attend Fan Round Up in Medicine Hat last weekend but they were under rainfall and flood watch so I thought it was wise to sit that con out. Luckily the town didn't get the floods like they thought they would. That's a big relief! Also friends posted pictures of the event anyway so it still made me happy even though I didn't go.
As for Nishikaze, it's tomorrow!!! I'll be helping DJ Murasaki run her photo booth so come say hi or get your photo taken. She is good at what she does and a nice person too.
I'll be dressed as Kari from the second season of Digimon! Preview below:
If there's still light out after the con, I may grab my tripod and take cosplay photos outside for once. It's going to look so weird and vain but all my friends who take my photos will be busy covering the con or working at it. So I don't want to disrupt them. Gives me more model/photo practice too. Or I can get my mom...she likes taking my pictures to show her friends who are far less proud of me than she is. XD My mom has mom goggles. The other day she was telling this girl at the thrift store that the stuff I was buying is for BJD's. To which she asked what they were and I replied "ball jointed dolls" and the girl looked a little creeped out and was ever so polite and just said "Well that sounds kind of cool."
Oh and I have more fabulous news! I finally got my doctor to start on the second part of my disability papers so yay!! The down side is I had to explain that I get homicidal; for him to actually clue in that something is wrong with me even though my mom has said I get suicidal every week and all that other stuff. I've mentioned my health in facebook and youtube post. So for full details look there. I'm too lazy to write everything down. At some point I will make a more detailed update video on my health.
Things got a little rough with my mom this week but we both apologized to each other. I explained to my mom the reason that I get homicidal is because I'm constantly pushed around by everyone and I feel like I can't stand up for myself because every time I have, I get told I'm rude or a bitch even if I'm careful to watch my words and keep my tone down. Also to my friends, don't think that means I'm going to turn on you. Honestly it's those everyday jack asses that make me tick and I NEVER EVER EVER want to even hurt some one but it gets to a point where some days I have no respect for rude people and I want to slap them in the face. I know I'm not psychopathic (I have no symptoms) because even the thought of hurting people makes me sick and I most definitely cannot hurt animals. Crazy people usually kill animals first but I have too much respect for animals and children. (Adults who know better not so much.) It's the everyday dick head that pushes my patience. I will be working with my therapist to work on assertiveness. I think that will help a lot because I even told her that I basically feel like I'm not allowed to talk or have an opinion. I can't even do that around my friends. They say they don't mind but when ever I start speaking my mind they start to argue me with or take things in the opposite way of what it's meant. So I really have problems expressing myself. It's something I've always had problems with since a child. The only way I know how to do it is in writing because I used to write poetry a lot and write in my journal.
Hope everyone has a good weekend. I think I may go back to my poetry writing again as disturbing as it is but I like it and really that's all that matters. It's like a cross between something Emilie Autumn and Matthew good would write to give you an idea. XD