As many of you know, I mentioned that I'd be attending Animethon this year. So far it's had many ups and downs. I am so thankfully for having helpful and understanding friends. My body is really struggling this year during cons. The average physical activity I can with stand is usually two or three hours before things start to hurt and my fatigue kicks in. That's mild activity only...very mild. I've currently been on my feet for more than eight hours a day during the convention which is a bit stupid of me but at the same time it's not often I get to see my convention friends as they live in other cities or provinces. I ended up being sore, my knee was acting up, I was almost throwing up this morning, had an asthma attack in my sleep, was getting organ inflamation again which is always fun and I had a few times where I just broke down and cried from exhaustion.
What made things worse is that this caused me to be very flabbergasted and plus with my bi-polar mind and my agoraphobia acting up; I honestly felt like the room was spinning for most of the con but I did managed. It really is scarying my a bit more than usual. As I've stated my agoraphobia (fear of crowds or going out) has gotten much worse. Even though I'm amongst friends it's very hard still sometimes and I did really have to push myself out of the hotel room. If I'm walking through the halls by myself I sort of try to look at things around the area to distract me as it does help some times. Another not so fun thing is that while most things I lost were found...I can't find my thousand dollar video camera which was a xmas present. I use that for my vlogs and it has videos of my pets on there which I really would like. The good thing about it though is there's nothing bad on there. They're some Project Sufy rants, which if you have seen those might scare the crap out of the finder and I have my practice dances on there which are probably far more scary. Hopefully tomorrow goes a little better. My friend's panel as well as mine both went well. Sabriel-Chan took some amazing pictures. She is also under the Facebook name "TLC Cosplay". Not much else to say for now really. I have been telling people who receive my cards that I blog about my health and the odd things I learn about mental and physical health in general. Otherwise people think I'm strictly just a cosplayer and become very angry or frustrated with me for being a normal human being and not displaying the personality of the characters I dress as. Plus I really don't like that talking about health, especially mental health is considered so taboo. It's a very normal and common thing and I don't think enough people realize that.
Okay now I'm really done. XD ....And I will have costume photos from a few different covention from even earlier this year up in a bit. I'm just trying to take things one day at a time. Having to move really upsets me. This may sound stupid too because the place I'd be moving into is back with my parents but I basically have my own suite and it's nicer than my current house but I feel very attached to my current place. It's one of the only places I have really felt safe in, it's quite, I have an awesome landlord and she always makes sure the down stairs neighbors are decent people as well. Lily really likes it there too. When I would bring her back from my parents to our home, she'd happily roll around the floor. My parents and I are managing living together anyway since they usually are at the farm and not home but I do worry about the winter when they will have to stay home. There is always always the fear of my mom going back to how she was or her and my step dad fighting which can be a little unsettling at times and can scare Lily. I noticed she doesn't like yelling or loud noises just like me.
Okay so I lied about being done. XD
I'm am still trying to remain positive though, I have had some fun times and I'm really happy even just to sit and chat with friends I haven't seen in awhile.
Speaking of friends; for that past few months I've been hearing things from various different friends; that they are being bullied by photographers, artist, cosplayers or companies. I would just like to sate that if you are one of these people, there is no reason to do such things. Don't tell people that they can't do something harmless that makes them happy. That's just rude and there isn't even any logic to that. I very much believe in always giving people a second chance and understand that people can change but if it becomes an on going thing I will politely ask you leave my friends alone and if you feel the need to make them cry, hopefully I don't find you. DUN DUN DUN. LOL! Yup I'm sleep deprived. Now to get some shut eye.
Tomorrow I'll be Mimi from season 2 digimon. Normally I don't do long journals on vacation but since they help me, it seemed appropriate. I will be definetly writting a letter to animethon staff or mentioning some suggestions in a review video. While there are some really awesome and helpful staff there are other that just don't care. Another case too is that some can be good at their jobs but not with people exactly. It might be due to a lot of staff being volunteer but at the same time lots of other cons have many volunteers who at least try to have a good attitude.This doesn't me you have to be smiling all the time and awake. I know their work is hard and drains them but it's just a case of knowing the difference between aggression and assertiveness. One particular staff member had me in tears and a few hours later a different staff member left my friend in tears. Again this is NOT every member some are truly AWESOME.
NOW I sleep.